A Letter From My Future Self – Dear Mentor

Leo Gura is the owner of the website and Youtube channel Actualized.org. He puts out videos every week, on a very consistent schedules, videos that often last for 45 minutes to an hour (or more) without making any cuts. This is my letter to him from my future self in December 2018.

Hello Leo,

My name is Robin Playe, a frenchman living in North Carolina. You must get thousands of these everyday, so I’ll keep it concise.

I am currently a senior in high school, turning 19 in a couple of weeks. I first stumbled upon your videos on Youtube about 4 years ago, during one of the lowest points in my life. I was depressed, but fed up with that state of mind, and actively looking for ways to come out of it. This is when I came across a video of yours called Why Am I Depressed? – The Shocking Truth Behind Your Depression.

Watching this changed everything. I felt as if many things I knew to be true but scared to execute were suddenly given permission to be believed, and additional knowledge was coming, pouring in. I have always been fascinated by psychology, which I will study in college, the main reason why your videos were so fascinating to me. Self-awareness has since been on top of my priority list and something I constantly try to improve on. Out of the many, many hours of your content I ended up listening to or watching, 13 of your videos I went through slowly and took long, detailed notes of (62 handwritten notebook pages).

As I kept watching, I tried to also take action, and not just engage in “mental masturbation”, as you would describe it; only taking in content but not actually doing anything with it. I started doing meditation, explore different subjects, and tried to hone in on what I thought to be my passions.

But here’s the thing. My 20 minutes meditation sessions got harder and harder to keep up with, and after about 2 solid weeks, ended. I tried picking it back up multiple times, but failed even more.

I started to see your determination towards enlightenment, but felt as if it was too much for me at the moment. The turning point of my depression had been when I moved back again from France to the U.S. I had, then, stopped being a people pleasure, explored my masculinity, as well as worked on my my emotional awareness, following some of your (best) content like How To Be Attractive – The Ultimate Attraction Strategy and How To Master & Control Your Emotions. Much of the information shared  seems like really basic information when I listen to it now, but wasn’t on my first time listening to them. Nevertheless, I felt that spiritual enlightenment was just too big of a commitment, especially including the fact that I was (and still am) in high school and absolutely not financially independent, among other factors.

It became obvious to me then. Self awareness was what I needed to keep pursuing, along with finding my life purpose, to build the necessary foundation for living my extraordinary life. Since then, I’ve decided to take the habit of doing at least 5 minutes of meditation per day; a small amount, but the habit itself is more important to me. I meditate more on days when I want to, and force myself to do that amount during tougher days (or more, sometimes). I have also, since then, decided to take the habits of taking at least 1 cold shower a day, often in the morning, in order to set the mood and foundation for my life: being able to throw myself into highly uncomfortable situations in order to grow as a human being and grow out of my comfort zone.

This next one is something that’s hard to declare in a publicly permanent manner, but one that’s been very important to me, and not talked about, as far I know, in any of your videos so far. I have decided to join the group NoFap, am now completely rebooted, and still on a very good no-PMO streak. I believe that PMO was having a very negative effect on my own psyche, and quitting it is one of the best decisions I could have taken in my entire life.

On top of all this, I have now written and published an ebook, something I’ve been meaning to do since I was a little kid, writing the first chapter of a novel in my blue notebook. I remember it like it was yesterday.

But all of that, although having had to be done by me kicking myself in the ass, is in big portion thanks to you. I don’t know where I would be at this point in my life if I hadn’t stumbled upon your content. Sure, what I’ve achieved so far could be considered small, but is, most importantly, the foundation for a soon-to-be freshman in college that wants to build an extraordinary life for himself.

Thank you for what you do and keep living your extraordinary life,

Robin Playe

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